Do you trust yourself?....

photo-sam-manns-unsplash.

I found myself pondering this question with a friend over coffee, and we fell deep into conversation over this. We both realised the complexity around this huge question.

I got home and sat with myself, asking myself this question honestly and realised I felt wobbly over this and how we often go outside of ourselves seeking the answers. We are bombarded with so much information that appears to imply it knows us better than we know ourselves and over the years of seeing this, we’ve become reliant on the outside for the answer. This creates a lack of trust in yourself, and I know I have struggled with this. Especially in the past where I’ve felt my body has let me down so I can’t trust it, which I’m sure many people can relate to, and then if I’ve made bad decisions or messed up, I feel like clearly I don’t make good decisions so I can’t trust myself. You end up really disconnecting from the idea you can trust yourself, and thats not to say we shouldn’t seek help or ask advice, it’s finding the balance between the two, it’s empowering ourselves enough to discern when we should listen to ourselves or maybe seek advice. 

We need to give ourselves more credit than we realise and reconnect to the idea, that we have the ability to know and we don’t always have to look outside of ourselves for all of the answers. 

It begins with rebuilding that trust relationship with yourself especially if you feel disconnected or that you haven’t really made very good decisions in the past or you feel all over the place. 

The irony is, when we feel for instance we’ve made a poor choice, its more that we’ve questioned ourselves so much the decision we’ve made has come from a disconnected place anyway. 

So how do we reconnect and start to trust ourselves again? 

Firstly, get clear where you are at with this question, this will help. Also have you ever really trusted yourself? For many people they may feel they never have. We go from children who rely on our parents to teenagers feeling confused and into adulthood, with no-one really ever guiding us on this. It’s not really a conversation we have its just assumed. Then we see people making decisions, and they seem stressed with this and question things, we sense this distrust everywhere.

So we have to start from the beginning, and build that trust relationship with ourselves. Build up a dialogue with our inner guidance, and trust there is a lot of wisdom within us, as well as what’s around us. Start small, that helps as it allows you to get context. 

Getting some still or quiet time is really helpful, as it allows you to create some space and see things a bit more clearly. This sometimes may feel impossible if you’re very busy but trying to find that time will help, even just a few minutes. My favourite thing I say to the people around me is, put your hand on your heart, what does your heart say over your head. It sounds silly, but often the first thing we answer with this, is the true answer and it’s learning to disconnect from all the outside voices and opinions and give yourself the opportunity to listen to yourself and trust that, this helps us align with ourselves. This takes time but with practise you can really notice you building that trust with yourself, and it’s not about being perfect or that you won’t make a poor choice, but it’s giving yourself this opportunity to trust yourself and this helps us believe in ourselves. 

I hope you’ve enjoyed reading this, and ‘do you struggle with this?’ I’ve found by talking to people we have many different thoughts and takes on this. I would love to hear yours.

If you struggle with this, reflect on this question and getting rebuilding that trust with yourself. 

Do you trust yourself? 

All my love 

Hannah X