Friendship, support and mental health ....
With mental health awareness month in full swing, I want to touch on the topic of positive friendships and having good support in your life for mental wellness and when you are going through a tough time.
Now, I’m not saying having support and good friends will stop issues because it won’t. I know this personally and you can still feel lonely with that support around you at times. However, the reality is it helps, and it helps people feel more supported despite what they’re feeling. It creates good foundations that if we fall we are caught and held by those around us.
This of course is a privilege and not everyone has this which I am aware of.
Sadly, in some cases too its just too much for some people and this has to be said too, and not by passed and I am aware thats a tough topic to talk about.
I’m dedicating this post to all the amazing support and friends I’ve had in my life, to the people who’ve loved, believed and supported me when I couldn’t myself. It gave me a strength that helped me heal and find ways that helped me to manage things. I was in a situation at 17 where people could of dropped out of my life but they didn’t even when I could no longer participate in life with them at that point. That was powerful for me to realise that people can still love you when you perceive yourself as broken which was what I felt.
Having interviewed quite a few people now people who’ve experienced mental health issues the thing thats helps other than the routes like therapy etc is having good support, family and friends has been a great help them all.
Don’t get me wrong it can be hard to talk to even the closet people in your life, and we often feel this way because we fear judgement and feel shame which gets in the way.
There’s is something incredibly powerful about opening up and sharing with someone without shame, when we let vulnerability be a super power. I’m the first to admit sometimes I still struggle with this occasionally, but I remind myself I always encourage people to reach out to me and I will hold that space for them, that actually people will for me too. Therefore it’s important I change my story around this, my main one being I don’t want to burden someone or judgment, if you’re like me awareness to this is key so you can release this.
Quality over quantity is everything and having some people in a close circle can be a really powerful and its important to remember this. Keep people in your circle who are a positive influence as this is vital because when in some form of mental crisis you don’t need people who are going to trip you up.
As we are all different how we handle things, and if you know someone is going through something and you don’t know what to say, just a short message saying “your thinking about them” can be powerful. I recognise too quite simply for some people it can be hard to understand, but it doesn’t mean they don’t care.
If you’re reading this and going through a tough time maybe this will be a reminder to reach out to someone and share, or if you prefer a stranger there are helplines and resources where you can reach out if that feels safer. Whatever is best for you, take that step forward!
Lastly, I appreciate dealing with mental health is a process but “getting by with a little help from your friends” may be just what you need as some of the medicine to help you heal.
In the words of Ram Das “we are all walking each other home”.
I’d love to hear your thoughts around this topic do reach out and share with me.
So much love and appreciation to those people in my life who are there and have been there. Quite simply I love you!
Hannah X
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