Are you riding the FOMO train?

Photo by Roberto Nickson (@g) on Unsplash

FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) is something which most of us suffer under at some point in our lives. I’m writing about this because I’ve been on the FOMO train many times and still do take that ride on occasion, and especially when my health has prevented me from doing certain activities.  As with many things, the more you subscribe to FOMO, the more of a hold it tends to have and can prevent you from being present with your life and from appreciating where you are and what you have already. The deep inner-pain which FOMO caused me when I sat from the sidelines as a teenager into my 20’s, watching my friends do all the normal things you do at those stages of your life, but being unable to join in, was huge. This left me feeling separate from myself and others, it stopped me from fully enjoying life and prevented me from appreciating the small blessings, causing unhappiness.

The big revelation for me was realising that everyone struggles with it in some form and everything is relative, it doesn’t matter which walk of life you come from, how much you’ve achieved or how good your life may seem. Seeing someone else doing the things we think we need to do or want to do, but being unable to do those things our self, feels like a loss or missed opportunity. We create this story of how much happier and better our lives would be if we were doing those things, but this is just a story which we concoct. Often when we desire to be like others to do what they do, we are looking at something through the lens of another and we really don’t know what’s going on behind that which is visible or on show.

We live in times where, if we allow it to, social media can heavily fuel this tendency towards FOMO.  The key is to get real and remember that we don’t know the full story behind the nice appearances, nor do we know what people are really feeling.

The truth is that staying stuck in FOMO will serve nothing more than to cause disconnection and inner discomfort.  I’m not saying that it isn’t hard when we feel we are missing out and I for one know people in situations that are really tough and for them, watching others play and have fun can be uncomfortable. But whatever your situation, FOMO is the same and you need to be kind to yourself and be grateful for all the small things, because everything is relative.  The one thing we have total power over is our attitude.

So, wherever you are at, you have a choice to get present and be willing to see things differently, to connect with feeling present and start appreciating even just the smallest things. Then things begin to shift even if it’s in a small way, and positive momentum is created and this should not be underestimated as the effect is compounding. Even if this is difficult to do, and even if you just make even semi-baby steps, you will begin to become focused on what you can do. Believe me, you will be surprised when you decide to jump off the FOMO train and watch your life shift and feel more connected. You will slip up and jump back on, because let’s face we are all only human, but a newfound awareness of it will make all the difference and will change your relationship to it, and you’ll start to feel better about things; as this happens, other gifts will appear and you will notice and access the ones which are already right under your nose.  

To all my fellow FOMO humans I feel you.

If you got to the end of this and related.....

Ask yourself how much are you riding that FOMO train?

How is it impacting your life? 

Are you willing to look at things differently and try and get more present in your life? 

Good luck 

All my love Hannah X